wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Randomize
