But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
