you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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