I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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