What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
