It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
did you just send me my own nude
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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