I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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