so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
