Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
