if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
