suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
