Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Also, beer. Big fan.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
