so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
