Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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