He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
