I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
