they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
