there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
you inspire me to be a worse person
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
whose parrot is this?
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
