five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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