Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
