I'm really into asian looking animals
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
