I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
