Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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