I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
