your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
