well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Randomize
