let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
