did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
What a dumb baby whore.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
