who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize