they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
