Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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