Rock
Scissors
Fuck
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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