WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
