idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
