apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
