I must be too annoying 4 u.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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