why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
