RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
