He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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