I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize