'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
