Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
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