Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I didn't notice because vodka
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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