She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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