You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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