i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
