Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Randomize
