is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Randomize
