so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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