where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
He is an equal opportunity slut.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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