I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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