i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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