You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
